Julie was the eldest child in a family of five children. There were also two dogs, a cat, two parakeets—andtwo parents—her mother and father. With all those living creatures around, it could get pretty lively around the Magill household, like on this one Saturday morning.
“Jimmy, let go of that! I was playing with it.”
“But it’s mine, and I never said you could use it!”
While Jimmy and his brother were having their “discussion” in their room (did they have to keep the door open, so the whole house could hear it?) Julie’s two sisters were watching TV in the living room. Her mom was on the phone talking to a neighbor about some upcoming event. And Dad?
“Where’s my new tie? I got it especially so I could wear it today. Has anybody seen it?”
Dad was running around, getting ready for some important meeting and, as usual, couldn’t find what he was looking for.
The two parakeets were merrily chattering away in the dining room, while the cat was nestled in her favorite location under the dining room table, purring softly. How could she sleep with all the noise? There wasn’t a quiet spot in the entire house!
The dogs were lucky. They had the whole back yard to themselves. Julie watched them with envy.
For the past hour, she had been trying to get a book report done that was due on Monday so she could have the rest of the weekend free. It seemed to be getting more impossible by the minute. She felt like screaming, and was about to, when a better idea came into her head. Looking out at the dogs again, she felt they had the right idea. She would go outside, too—away from it all.
Behind their house and beyond the back yard was a small woods that didn’t seem to belong to anybody. On a previous Saturday, when she had also felt like screaming (as a matter of fact she actually did scream that day), she went running out of the house into the woods and came upon a tree whose branches and leaves drooped all the way to the ground, all the way around. It made a snug little room inside. In the coming months, Julie would return there many times—and today was a day she needed to again.
It had become a place where she could shut out the world. In there, she found she would think about things she could nowhere else. Thoughts and feelings about her life, her family and friends, school, her dreams and hopes, came to her in such a way that she could hold them in front of her and sort them out.
Everywhere else she went, these things were all jumbled up in her mind and made her feel confused and anxious. Yet here, there was a calmness and serenity that helped her put them in perspective. Here, it all seemed to make more sense. Here, she would feel some kind of happiness inside that she experienced nowhere else. The only way she could explain it in her mind was that there under the willow tree was a place where she could meet “herself”—that is, the person who she really was.
Later, when Julie returned home to almost the same chaos she had left, she smiled to herself. Now she was carrying peace inside of her.
Comments:
When we are very small, most of our attention is taken up with the world around us. We are naturally curious about that world. Everything is new, and we can spend endless hours exploring our surroundings in many ways. Especially after we’re able to crawl and climb, we use this new-found freedom to get into almost everything, from hall closets and kitchen cabinets to our parents’ dresser and the bathroom medicine cabinet. If you ask your mom, she’ll probably tell you that you scared her to death with all your explorations.
When we were little, we liked to spend a lot of time building and creating things, whether it was blocks, drawings, imaginary stores, or hideouts. We liked to play games—indoors and out. Some of us probably made up our own games.
As our consciousness grew, so did our awareness of the world around us. We had experiences involving our family, school, neighborhood, some parts of our town or city, and some other areas we may have visited, perhaps on a school field trip, or with our family. Through our schoolwork and other reading, our knowledge of the world grew.
Our knowledge of the “outer” world continues to grow throughout our lives. But we also have an “inner” world. There is another vast world inside of us. By that, we are not talking about all of our blood vessels, muscles, and other organs of our bodies. We mean the world of our thoughts, feelings, and the ideas swirling around inside of us. Young children do not pay much attention to this world, but during adolescence, this part of our life will occupy more and more of our attention as we try to understand ourselves and the world we live in.
As we explore this inner world, we may sometimes become lost. Our thoughts and feelings may be confusing. In a sense, this is all part of the growing up process; something we all have to go through in order to understand who we are. Although we may go through difficult times, if we don’t stop exploring, we will eventually find some real gems within us. This is because there is something special and unique about each one of us. It is said that every person is a genius at something. It is up to us to discover what our special gifts are.
We can think of our inner world like a hidden sanctuary, where no one but ourselves can enter. No matter what is going on around us, it can be a secret place that we can always retreat to and feel peaceful—a refuge from the outer world of constant activity and movement. From our inner world springs the strength not only to cope with the outer world, but to bring our unique contributions to it.
Questions for reflection
1. In the story above, why did Julie feel like screaming?
2. Why is the tree in the woods so special to her?
3. Are there times when you feel like Julie and want to escape somewhere?
4. At those times, what do you do?
5. What is an “identity”?
6. Have you ever been in touch with your inner world?
7. What is unique about your identity?
8. Do you have a special place where you can retreat and meet your true self?
Exercise: “Family movie”
Watch a movie or TV show in which there is a family with several children of various ages. What kinds of interests do the children have? In what way are these interests dependent on their ages? Are the older ones somehow more aware of their inner world than the younger ones? How does each of them handle stressful situations in the family?
Reflection exercise: “My inner world”
Think of what was presented in this chapter in relation to you. How would you describe your inner world? Is there some place where you can go to explore this world—for example, a physical place like Julie’s tree, or perhaps a diary/journal? Is there a particular time of day when you can be alone with your thoughts—just before going to bed, or early in the morning, before anyone else wakes up? If not, try finding a time and a place where you can go to explore this world.
Julie's story
Julie was the eldest child in a family of five children. There were also two dogs, a cat, two parakeets—andtwo parents—her mother and father. With all those living creatures around, it could get pretty lively around the Magill household, like on this one Saturday morning.“Jimmy, let go of that! I was playing with it.”
“But it’s mine, and I never said you could use it!”
While Jimmy and his brother were having their “discussion” in their room (did they have to keep the door open, so the whole house could hear it?) Julie’s two sisters were watching TV in the living room. Her mom was on the phone talking to a neighbor about some upcoming event. And Dad?
“Where’s my new tie? I got it especially so I could wear it today. Has anybody seen it?”
Dad was running around, getting ready for some important meeting and, as usual, couldn’t find what he was looking for.
The two parakeets were merrily chattering away in the dining room, while the cat was nestled in her favorite location under the dining room table, purring softly. How could she sleep with all the noise? There wasn’t a quiet spot in the entire house!
The dogs were lucky. They had the whole back yard to themselves. Julie watched them with envy.
For the past hour, she had been trying to get a book report done that was due on Monday so she could have the rest of the weekend free. It seemed to be getting more impossible by the minute. She felt like screaming, and was about to, when a better idea came into her head. Looking out at the dogs again, she felt they had the right idea. She would go outside, too—away from it all.
Behind their house and beyond the back yard was a small woods that didn’t seem to belong to anybody. On a previous Saturday, when she had also felt like screaming (as a matter of fact she actually did scream that day), she went running out of the house into the woods and came upon a tree whose branches and leaves drooped all the way to the ground, all the way around. It made a snug little room inside. In the coming months, Julie would return there many times—and today was a day she needed to again.
It had become a place where she could shut out the world. In there, she found she would think about things she could nowhere else. Thoughts and feelings about her life, her family and friends, school, her dreams and hopes, came to her in such a way that she could hold them in front of her and sort them out.
Everywhere else she went, these things were all jumbled up in her mind and made her feel confused and anxious. Yet here, there was a calmness and serenity that helped her put them in perspective. Here, it all seemed to make more sense. Here, she would feel some kind of happiness inside that she experienced nowhere else. The only way she could explain it in her mind was that there under the willow tree was a place where she could meet “herself”—that is, the person who she really was.
Later, when Julie returned home to almost the same chaos she had left, she smiled to herself. Now she was carrying peace inside of her.
Comments:
When we are very small, most of our attention is taken up with the world around us. We are naturally curious about that world. Everything is new, and we can spend endless hours exploring our surroundings in many ways. Especially after we’re able to crawl and climb, we use this new-found freedom to get into almost everything, from hall closets and kitchen cabinets to our parents’ dresser and the bathroom medicine cabinet. If you ask your mom, she’ll probably tell you that you scared her to death with all your explorations.
When we were little, we liked to spend a lot of time building and creating things, whether it was blocks, drawings, imaginary stores, or hideouts. We liked to play games—indoors and out. Some of us probably made up our own games.
As our consciousness grew, so did our awareness of the world around us. We had experiences involving our family, school, neighborhood, some parts of our town or city, and some other areas we may have visited, perhaps on a school field trip, or with our family. Through our schoolwork and other reading, our knowledge of the world grew.
Our knowledge of the “outer” world continues to grow throughout our lives. But we also have an “inner” world. There is another vast world inside of us. By that, we are not talking about all of our blood vessels, muscles, and other organs of our bodies. We mean the world of our thoughts, feelings, and the ideas swirling around inside of us. Young children do not pay much attention to this world, but during adolescence, this part of our life will occupy more and more of our attention as we try to understand ourselves and the world we live in.
As we explore this inner world, we may sometimes become lost. Our thoughts and feelings may be confusing. In a sense, this is all part of the growing up process; something we all have to go through in order to understand who we are. Although we may go through difficult times, if we don’t stop exploring, we will eventually find some real gems within us. This is because there is something special and unique about each one of us. It is said that every person is a genius at something. It is up to us to discover what our special gifts are.
We can think of our inner world like a hidden sanctuary, where no one but ourselves can enter. No matter what is going on around us, it can be a secret place that we can always retreat to and feel peaceful—a refuge from the outer world of constant activity and movement. From our inner world springs the strength not only to cope with the outer world, but to bring our unique contributions to it.
Questions for reflection
1. In the story above, why did Julie feel like screaming?
2. Why is the tree in the woods so special to her?
3. Are there times when you feel like Julie and want to escape somewhere?
4. At those times, what do you do?
5. What is an “identity”?
6. Have you ever been in touch with your inner world?
7. What is unique about your identity?
8. Do you have a special place where you can retreat and meet your true self?
Exercise: “Family movie”
Watch a movie or TV show in which there is a family with several children of various ages. What kinds of interests do the children have? In what way are these interests dependent on their ages? Are the older ones somehow more aware of their inner world than the younger ones? How does each of them handle stressful situations in the family?
Reflection exercise: “My inner world”
Think of what was presented in this chapter in relation to you. How would you describe your inner world? Is there some place where you can go to explore this world—for example, a physical place like Julie’s tree, or perhaps a diary/journal? Is there a particular time of day when you can be alone with your thoughts—just before going to bed, or early in the morning, before anyone else wakes up? If not, try finding a time and a place where you can go to explore this world.